How I spent my summer vacation...

...and my fall, and most of this winter.

Before I get to the bad, I want to tell you that I'm feeling much better now. I'm mentally geared up to take off all the weight I've gained. I'm in a positive frame of mind right now, so remember that while you read about my downfall. That word is too melodramatic, but I don't know how else to say it.

This spring I found out I have a mold allergy, and my house is full of mold. It was making me very sick, fatigued and allergic to everything else. You see, the mold allergy is affecting my thyroid big time. Plus I have a family history of low thyroid function. Low thyroid in turn causes other allergies. That's why I had a reaction to every new food I introduced.

Mold is a serious problem, and we had to act. We started with the bathroom in the middle of June, after our vacation out East. Can't live in a house without a bathroom (we only have the one), so we moved in with my parents. My husband worked on the remodel after work and on Saturdays, then came to my parent's house just in time to go to sleep every night. He took Sundays off, so we did have one day a week to spend together.

Meanwhile, I had a new list of foods to avoid so as not to make the mold living inside my body grow and multiply. Very strict. Lasted 8 days. My mom is an excellent baker. It was my dad's birthday cake that did me in. My whole family--each and every one of them, bless their hearts--kept saying they couldn't believe I was passing up the delicious chocolate cake my mom served after lunch. I held out against that until after supper. I said it's just one piece of cake, it won't hurt too much.

But it was the beginning of the end. My cravings roared to life and only got worse. I kept eating the sweets my mom baked. I told myself I'd be home in a week or two, and I could undo the damage. But one thing after another prolonged this remodel, and I was living at my parents' for 10 weeks.

I was in denial. Sort of detached from reality. I was counting on hot weather to be able to swim every day for exercise. The average temperature was around 56 the whole summer. Yes, there were a few hot days where I could swim, but for the most part, I didn't exercise at all. I could have gone for walks, or chosen another form of exercise. Denial, remember? I missed my husband and I was depressed. I knew I was gaining weight and felt helpless to stop it. I turn to food when I'm depressed.

I had already gained some of my HCG weight back, as I posted this spring. My vacation to the East coast put a few more pounds on me. I weighed 150 mid-June. By the end of this 10 weeks away from home, I weighed 174. That's a BMI of 27.2. Unhealthy. As if that's not bad enough, the story isn't done.

I moved back home, to my moldy house--the bathroom is only the start of it--in the habit of eating anything I wanted. I had okay energy at my parents, but I wasn't using it. The combination of being back in the moldy environment and eating the wrong foods sapped my energy. It only took two weeks for me to become completely non-functional. Seriously, most days showering was too much for me. I kept up with my laundry for the most part, but that was the only housework I could do.

During those first two weeks back home, fortunately, my house got a scrubbing from top to bottom. Construction dust, and my husband living like a bachelor for 10 weeks wasn't kind to my house. That was the beginning of September. It was the second week of December before I cleaned my house again.

It takes energy to eat right. If I'm going to have something better than toast or a sandwich for lunch, I have to cook. I couldn't. Once in a while I could cook supper--throwing something in a crock pot in the morning when my energy is highest saved me. The rest of the time my husband cooked or we had a frozen or fast food option.

Then came Christmas. Nuff said. Christmas extended through January 6th, when family from out of state left. I was up to 188. The highest I've been in my life was 182. I got serious. I can't do much about the mold--my husband will do more remodeling and cleanup this spring and summer--but I can do something about the way I eat.

I mustered the will power. I made much use of the crock pot. In three weeks I've lost 6 pounds. My energy is coming back. I'm down to my former highest weight of 182. I'm feeling surprisingly good about that. I'll have a few more details tomorrow. This post is too long already.

I'm getting back to me again, and it feels wonderful.